When it comes to men, figuring out whether or not they have a thing for you can be quite easy if you know what signs to look out for. The easiest way to catch a man’s interest in you is by noticing his eyes – does he furtively try to glance at you? Are his pupils delated and eyebrows high? Chances are high that he harbors feelings for you! But what if he’s an ace player who is just messing with you?
What if he is only making you think that he has feelings for you but in truth, he’s merely using you? Women can be silly and take a very long time before finally understanding that the man they think is interested is actually not into them at all. Have you been wondering whether your boyfriend loves you in truth or he’s just using you for the time being? If you are, here is our list of 13 signs he’s using you to help you take the right next steps.
1 – He has contacts that make you doubt him
A man who is genuinely interested in making things work with you wouldn’t have anything to hide. A con, on the other hand, will have various people contacting him that you know nothing about. He’ll avoid certain calls in your company or never let you know who’s behind the weird number he has been receiving calls from.
His message inbox may also contain fishy messages. All these odd contacts that he doesn’t disclose will make you doubt him, but he’ll always make sure to make up a false story to keep the truth from you. It can be that he’s talking to sketchy people who are involved with him in indirectly using you or that he has some other girl who is his main while you’re just the side chick.
2 – He is all words, no actions
From promises of a beautiful future to immediate apologies, a man who is not true to you will always say the right things. His words would make you believe him, fall for him, and erase all the doubts that he have ever had regarding him. But the difference between a man who actually cares for you and him will be apparent.
You see, a player never makes mistakes with his wording, but he doesn’t have much to offer when it comes to actions. He makes you see dreams for what he’d do for you in the future but has nothing to give in the present.
3 – He doesn’t have the best reputation
What you say about your man is not all that matters; hear out what other people have to say about him too. If a man doesn’t have many people saying that he is good, if his colleagues complain about his problematic behavior, then that’s where your doubt should begin. An even bigger question mark arises if he doesn’t have anyone to say anything about him at all.
For instance, he doesn’t let you know about the people he grew up with, the friends he hangs out with or the places he goes to. People only know him vaguely like he is someone new. You can also have a look at his social media accounts to figure out his circle and the comments people leave.
4 – He keeps asking for favors
One of the biggest telltale signs that he is just using you is that he keeps asking for favors. What does he give in return? Nothing. That’s the thing about greedy, manipulative people – they keep asking for money, great time in the bedroom, and a lot of other things by selling you promises but they don’t plan on returning you even a drop of the ocean you hand to them.
A man who is genuinely in love with you will want to please you which means he will be open to being giving. He wouldn’t always expect you to pay for everything, he would also give you gifts, whatever you want in the bedroom, and more. The power balance will be equal.
5 – He doesn’t care about your feelings
Many people who use you don’t do so for materialistic purposes. Sometimes they just like to be around so that you bear their emotional burden. This means they share their problems with you, dump their stress on you, and expect you to listen and agree to them. They just want to feel better which is why they use you as a free therapist.
But when comes the time of giving you some attention, care or even just an ear, a conman wouldn’t waste a breath trying to listen to you or console you. He wouldn’t want to put even a single effort to make you feel better because he doesn’t care at all about your feelings.
What you can do about such a person?
If someone doesn’t have much to offer and only takes from you, plus it is evident that he is merely using you and not true to you, its better for you to move on from them. Listen to your gut and move out of an unfulfilling, imbalanced relationship. Feed your soul instead until someone better walks into your life. Staying will only add negative energy to your life. And remember, you don’t have enough time to waste on someone who is only using you.